Archive | February, 2013


27 Feb

I think a little part of me has given up on trying to eat well.

It’s like I’ve been given this opportunity and now I just want to wait for the surgery to “sort me out”. But I know I can’t do that.

Hadn’t been to the gym for five days due to the hospital and getting the puppy and I just haven’t felt well for about two weeks, but I forced myself to go yesterday, I said If I go I can have some chocolate and it worked, but now I have to go without bribing myself with junk! Why is it so hard? I know what to do, it makes it so frustrating.

I emailed the nurse we had the meeting with on Friday to ask about the diet. I must say it’s worrying me alot. How am I meant to stick to a month of high proteins and low carbs. I haven’t been able to do it yet, so how will I do it then. I asked her if I could try the diet or did they not recommend it and she said that because it isnt balanced she wouldn’t want me following it now. I was a bit unhappy about that, I wanted a “trial” run.

My problem is, I get so bored with eating the same things, when I’m eating healthy I don’t want to have pasta cooked the same way every day and we seem to get into that habit  I want something new and different flavoured, but I just don’t know what to cook. I know there are recipes out there, but then if I don’t like them I’ve wasted money and time. So I stick to the same things and just get bored until I eventually give up.

One of the blogs I follow Dana, is on the pre op liquid diet, she sounds like she is doing amazingly well, I think she has a week left before life changes forever in a good way. I’m excited for her and her list of what she can’t wait to happen. She makes the diet sound so easy. I know mine is going to be different, but I hope I get through it like she is!

Ah well struggle on another day, off to the gym soon.

Cuteness time;



Full steam ahead

23 Feb

So excited I get to pick up my little puppy this afternoon! Two weeks since I’ve seen her feels like ages ago now. Shes grown a lot looking at the pictures.

CadyYesterday went well. I went to my first appointment for my eyes, now that was weird, they put drops in that sting like soap in your eyes, then you have to wait twenty minutes for your pupils to dilate, before having photographs taken of the backs of your eyes. I did not like that at all, I couldn’t focus on anything close up for about two hours after it, was horrible, so I felt like a celebrity driving to my next appointment, I had sunglasses on all the way, even though it was cloudy! lol It was painful with the light, because my pupils couldn’t adjust. I don’t have to go for a year to eighteen months for that again, he said my eyes looked good, but the results will be back in a few weeks, but he wasn’t worried by what he saw.

Then I went to the appointment I’d been waiting for, I wrote a post on a WLS site yesterday about that, so I’m just going to copy it here;

I was called into a small room with nurse with another woman, she said the people that were with us could come as well, so there were four of us in there. Normally she likes to do it with 6-8 people, but the hospital is being rebuilt so she only had a small room.

She had information packs for us and a computer which had a lot of bullet points on it that she went through and answered any questions as we went along.

She was a lovely woman and made us feel at ease. The other woman asked if we could still be turned down and she said probably not now we had made it there, as funding had been granted by that point, now its going though all the other stages, she said the operation will be in about eight months from now. In April there will be the first appointment with the surgeon, then nutritionist, anesthetist possibly psychiatrist if needed, not always the case then back to the surgeon where we tell them what surgery we want, they only offer the sleeve and gastric bypass, no bands anymore. Then we will be put on the waiting list for the operation.

So like I said the whole process will take about eight months, with two years going back to the hospital for checkups.

Hope this helps anyone else who is going to Morriston for their surgery.

I meant to ask why there were only two options, there is no bpd/ds but forgot. I think I’m going to go for the gastric bypass which is the Roux-en-Y. It has a better result with curing diabetes that the sleeve. Obviously I will talk to the surgeon, its a more dangerous option, but the results are better and they do recommend that one to diabetics, they won’t do this option on non diabetics anymore.

So it was a very good and informative day yesterday. I came home read the info pack she gave us and filled out most of the forms, I just have the three day diet sheet to fill out. The forms will probably say I’m a little crazy so will have to see the psychologist!

Oh and these do a month long liver reduction diet, it’s not liquid like I have read other people have, I think it’s basically reducing carbs, you eat mainly protein in month with two pieces of bread allowed daily, I think that’s what she said anyway, will get more information on that closer to the date.

So by November I should have a date for surgery! Not as quick as they do it in American and places where you have insurance, but at least I’m on my way now.

Very excited!

Puppy Power

20 Feb

Two more days and I have two hospital appointments on different sides of my little country. First one is diabetic retinopathy screening, where they take photographs of the back of your eyes to see if there are any changes due to diabetes. I’m a little bit worried about this one.

Second one is in Swansea and I’m looking forward to this one a bit more, its an educational session for bariatric surgery. I should hopefully learn what is available and a little more about the procedure and whats involved. I’m rather excited, for a long time I never wanted to have surgery, I thought I could do this on my own. I lost seven and a half stone by myself (before putting it all and more back on) and thought I would be able to do it again. But I can’t. I have tried and tried, but it’s just not happening so I’ve conceded to the surgery. Since I first got online back in 2000 I have read hundreds of stories about people having surgery, so I understand the risks, there weren’t as many people back then doing it, or at least people weren’t blogging about it, because there wasn’t so many online, but now it’s all over. I think I am as prepared as I can be. I’ve never had surgery and only stayed in hospital overnight once. I know it’s a huge risk and something that cannot be changed once done, but I feel like I’m all out of options now, so I have accepted this and am even looking forward to it.

I know its not a miracle cure, I know it will be hard work and painful, and while the surgery will reduce what I eat, it can’t change my way of thinking. There are so many ways around it and “cheating” as such, but I am going into this with my eyes wide open and I would like to think I wouldn’t make that mistake after all I will go though to try and make myself more healthy. I want this so bad right now, I’m hoping it wont be another two year wait.

Since I found out I was diabetic I have lost 11kg which I am happy about, although I don’t think I have lost anything this week, so feeling a bit disappointed, I had been quite ill during the week and didn’t get to the gym as much so that probably why, but I was hoping it would come off anyway with all the meds I am on. This will be week four with the Bydureon on Friday everything seems okay so far. I had a blood test this week and I just rang to find out the number as the doctor wants to see me, its 49, I think normal is 40, so it’s slightly over still, but last time was in the 60s, so it’s coming down (why they have a different system to the blood pricking machines I don’t know, just to confuse you I think!)

In different news on Saturday I’m going to get a new puppy! I’m so excited, we went to look at her two weeks ago, she was only 4 weeks then and as long as she is still eating okay by Saturday she will be mine! I’ve bought her loads of puppy toys, I can’t wait to get her, she is so adorable. Bichon Frise with a quarter Jack Russell, Fudge is getting a new sister to play with, shes not going to know whats hit her on the weekend!

Cady – Fast asleep in someones shoe!

Sugar Hell Indeed

4 Feb

Had my meeting with the fitness instructor, Sarah Jane today, she was so nice and understood where I was coming from.

We had a very long chat this afternoon and she’s setting up a program for me for tomorrow, it will all be on my key ready for when I get in there. Really looking forward to it.

Had a horrible night with food, well ate well, but ended up having an Easter egg :/ I feel quite ill now though.

I’m never going to be perfect, but as long as I don’t go “oh well, I’ve ruined it,  let’s eat everything then” I should be ok.. I want to work it off tomorrow anyway!

Easy Peasy!

1 Feb

I came home from the gym this afternoon. I knew I had to do it, I knew I had put it off and now was the time. There was a moment of diversion though, Fudge had escaped out the front door and of course she went right for the mud, it looks so squishy and dirty, how could she not? Damnit, now I had to take care of her and muddy paws and tummy (the joys of being a small dog!) up to the bathroom we went. Placed her in the bath and showedr her little belly and feet, she looked up and me as if to say, “why me, why? I was happy with the mud”. She was really not impressed, but I had to get her clean, fast. I washed the bath and came back downstairs.

I went to the kitchen, I knew what I wanted was in there, sitting nicely in the fridge. I washed my hands with some antibac soap, and I opened the door to the fridge and found what I was looking for. Nerves were setting in. “Could I do this?” , “Will I have to get someone else to do it for me?”, no, no I had to do this myself.  So I sat down at my desk, opened up the instructions. I followed them closely, scared I would make a mistake and ruin it. I opened up the packet and did exactly what it said, step by step. I doubled checked everything and when I was done, I put it down on my desk and stared. In fact I was quite delighted in what I had just made, I just didn’t know if I could use it. I was so happy infact I took a photograph to honour the moment. Behold the syringe in all its glory:




I can do this..

I can do this..


I knew I couldn’t wait long. So I finished off reading what to do. Pinched my tummy and put the needle close, now it was scary. I slowly started to push, harder than I thought, but there was only a sharp pain right after the needle entered the skin, after that it was alright. I pushed in as far as I could, then slowly pushed the plunger, I was very nervous doing that bit, I probably could have done it a little faster, but there seemed to be a bit of force required and I didn’t know how fast to do it.

So there we go, I did it. I wanted that moment for a few weeks now, I was looking forward to having the injections just for the fact it might reduce my appetite, but when you’re sat there with it and you’ve never done anything like that before, its rather daunting to say the least. In all honesty, I can say that is easier than doing the finger prick. Even though its only a sharp pain for a second, sometimes it takes me a moment to actually press the button, because its a shock almost. But because I took it slow and steady with the needle it seemed easier.

On gym news, I should be getting a program soon. We use these electronic keys for every machine and it keeps track of what you’ve done, how far, fast and calories you’ve done and what you should do next, but when you join its a generic program, so I’m going to get one a little more suited to me.

I sneakily took some pictures while I was there today to show my mum, I’m going to add them here too, just cos I love these machines.

Here’s to tomorrow workout !!


The person who takes me!


Lovely pool, so relaxing


They’re all moving so much faster than me :/


TV screen on the treadmill


Matt again!


Oh look footie..

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